If AOL Were A City...

- You'd only pay $21.95 a month to live there, but half the time you tried to leave your house, the door would be stuck.

- 48 hours after moving in, your mailbox would be overflowing with special offers, promotions and discounts from www.buttsmack.com

- If you saw a crime and called 911, they'd reply a week later with a form letter saying how you "really are important you are to us".

- Whenever you traveled to other cities, people would see your license tag and laugh behind your back.