New Years Resolutions We Can Keep

Are you sick of making the same resolutions year after year that you never keep? Why not promise to do something you can actually accomplish? Here are some resolutions that you can use as a starting point:

1. I want to gain weight. Put on at least 30 pounds.

2. Stop exercising. Waste of time.

3. Read less.

4. Watch more TV. I've been missing some good stuff.

5. Procrastinate more.

6. Start being superstitious.

7. Quit giving money & time to charity.

8. Spend more time at work.

9. Take a vacation to someplace important: like to see the largest ball of twine.

10. Stop bringing lunch from home: I should eat out more.